Toast to That

Toasts at the reception are like the cake. The majority of the time, they are delicious; however, every once in awhile, you experience a toast that is not so sweet. There are a lot of different factors when it comes to planning your wedding day toasts, and the one I want to focus on today is who should give a toast at your wedding? Do you keep it traditional with the father of the bride (if he is hosting), maid of honor, and best man? Or do you open the mic up?

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The most important thing to consider when planning your toasts is that the fewer, the better. That way, your reception can seamlessly flow from one thing to another rather than seeming like a college lecture. You want whoever is giving the toast to have a clear direction of where they are going and to keep it simple. Your guests are there to enjoy the food, dancing, and company, not sit there all night listening to others reminisce.

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With that said, I think it is best to stick to four categories: the parents or father of the bride (especially if they paid or helped you pay), the maid of honor, the best man, and the bride and groom themselves. These are the most important people in your life and therefore, honor them by having them be the only people to talk at your wedding. These moments between you and these people are special, and you don’t want to muddle them by having everyone and Grandma talk. I do think it is important to thank your guests at some point as well. After dinner, before dessert, is a great time to do so. Ask your wedding planner when it fits best in your personal wedding timeline.

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If you have people in your life that you really want to hear from, I suggest having them (bridesmaids, childhood friends, cousins, etc.) speak at the rehearsal dinner. That way, you are not flooding your wedding day timeline with speeches, but filling it with fun and festivities instead. Yet, those important to you can still share their congratulations. This would be a good time for the groom’s parents to speak to the couple as well.


Whoever you choose, treasure the words your toast-givers have to say. Whether you laugh or cry, those you choose to give toasts are surely worth a raised glass.


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